Friday, October 21, 2005

the trial of the m--f--ing century

Screw the Michael Jackson trial; all these little snippets I hear about Saddam's trial are making that circus seem like a side-show. Sort of an appetizer for the main course.

It's making me re-think my anti-war position. If all wars end with the deposed leaders carrying on like they're not in a world of shit, I'm all for armchair quarterbacking many, many more illegal wars.

Saddam, with his amazing gall, is keeping me grinning ear to ear. It may not be intentional, but he's one funny mo-fo. He should do the talk show circuit before his ass gets executed. I'm thinking he'd do well on Leno.

And there are so many other world leaders we can go after next. I'm talking bigger and badder! Take, for instance, the "illegal regime" of Vladdy-boy Putin. I'm sure he isn't blameless in the whole Chechnya affair! Then he can be all, "but I'm rightfully president," and "blah blah blah," and so on, and someone, say the French, will send assassins in to take out his defense attorney, and we can get all gitmo on his sorry ass. It'll be awesome.

Speaking of the French, when are we gonna take that Chirac sumvabitch down a notch. His ass is begging for it. And whoever's in charge of Canada--yeah, screw that guy! Let's see your universal healthcare save you now!!!

Speaking of Canada, they seem to have their sights on our guy. Even though it's basically symbolic, it's still pretty funny!

But you know what really does it for me in the trial at hand? Saddam is actually out-swaggering our own idiot-in-chief! Don't that beat all... Were it not for all the torturing and raping and stuff, he woulda made a killer stand-up! Such a shame, all that wasted potential.

happier days