Thursday, July 14, 2005

Santorum for President '08

Friends, you may think I write this in jest, but hear me out and you will see the logic in my thinking. Senator Rick Santorum (Santorum being the word for the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the result of anal sex--you can thank Dan Savage for that one, not me (I'm just the messenger)) is considering a presidential bid in 2008, and I, for one, endorse him whole-heartedly as the republican nominee. Here's an example of how in touch with the pulse of the nation the Pennsylvania Senator is:

Earlier this week, Santorum stood by comments he made on a Catholic website in 2002 when he said, "It is no surprise that Boston, a seat of academic, political, and cultural liberalism in America, lies at the center of the storm" of the clergy sexual abuse scandal. In a brief interview with the [Boston] Globe on Tuesday, Santorum reiterated his view that the "basic liberal attitude" in Boston fostered an environment where sexual abuse of children could occur.

It's simple logic like that that... even the most mentally deficient amoeba wouldn't have trouble understanding. It's like how the terrorists hate us because the liberals have all of the control over Amer... i... oh, right, never mind.

If he throws his hat into the ring, there's only one thing I can do: change my party affiliation to republican so I can help him become the GOP nominee in 2008. Then the democrats can nominate anyone from Hillary Clinton to an inanimate carbon rod and still take back the whitehouse.

God, that guy is such an idiot.

I had a joke about this, but decided against it since it was too easy.